Dear Stranger

I like strangers.
I'm glad we got off on the cute foot. *shaking hands*

First off, you will notice that my face is not friendly. Don't fret. I am the pink care-bear trapped in a meanie's facial expressions. Also, I don't judge people from first expressions. I judge them on the third impression. Therefore at least, if one of us initially fucks up - there is a grace window to save face. Stranger, I love home made food and wine drinking. If we meet in these wonderful settings, we'll be friends forever I bet. I'm partial to meeting you in debauchery filled environments, but that doesn't mean I'm an alcoholic :) So I will refuse to this every single weekend. Oh yes, I must mention - if you are an educated, fit, tall and handsome man - then excuse me in advance for my inappropriate behavior. Because I may not be your type - but you're certainly mine.

You have been warned.

Stranger, please know that if you are rude - then you're the exception to the 3rd impression rule. I shall cancel you immediately (without further adieu). I can't stand rude people. While we're on this subject, if you are rude AND ugly, then stop reading this and forget we ever met. But let me leave you with this oh Rude AND Ugly one, choose one God. You can't serve two. So what's it gonna be? Will you be rude? or will you be ugly?

Stranger, I'm a bit of a geek. If you don't want to hear me drone on and on and on about something, don't you dare mention African Politics, The (w)rapper Nelly, Keri Hilson's new video, or Raheem Devaughns (did I spell that right?) video.

If you happen to end up getting a crush on me, then definitely don't ignore my birthday or valentines day. And I'm not just talking about a phone call here Stranger, if you want me to remember you - you have to stand out. I highly recommend sending me flowers, or exotic fruits all year round, and something like a cupcake or lunch date for my birthday/valentines. I'd take this advice while I can Stranger, because if I get rich - that golden piece of advice will be replaced with things like a weekend in Greece. Getting your foot in the door while you can is imperative.

Enough about men. See how easily distracted I get? Well, it's not my fault. No, seriously. It's just that - I am very fond of people. I want to help them, even when they don't want to help themselves. Even when I don't want to help myself. There is fine print with this though... as they say, the Headline giveth, the fine print taketh away. We shall talk more about this. If you read these letters, you'll get an idea.

You'll also find that I love being alone. I can't explain this one. When I was growing up, I was NEVER alone. But now, I don't take the privilege lightly. There's nothing better to me than coming home to myself.

Oh yeah, Stranger, try not to take advantage of me.

I told you we'd be friends ;)